|
Fat
Albert
by Mark Capitelli
Pathetic
I’ve seen a lot of bad films in my brief
time on this earth, but this’n might just take the prize. I’m
sure this comes as no surprise to anyone who saw the
advertisement featuring the Cosby Kids passing through the
television into the “real world.” You know, the real world
where sixteen-year-old girls watch Fat Albert religiously after
school everyday.
Anyway, the point of the film (and I use
that term loosely) is that a lonely, nerdy, young girl cries
about being a lonely, nerdy, young girl and a tear falls on her
remote control. This tear magically opens a portal into Fat
Albert’s animated reality and allows him to pass into her
reality so that he can solve her problems for her by giving her
self-confidence. Naturally, the rest of the crew follows him.
Now this poor girl has the whole Cosby crew chasing her around,
complete with their lack of knowledge regarding anything human,
let alone modern (i.e. at one point Fat Al doesn’t realize he
needs money to pay for things… a moment where I think a little
part of me died). Despite these hindrances, Fat Al and the gang
manage to make friends and influence a bunch of hip-hop hotties
into learning to have some innocent fun that doesn’t include
anything that Bill Cosby would consider to be a
misrepresentation of your average young black urbanite… right
down to their white friends who apparently lost their brains in
the war. “Big Al” even manages to romance the gorgeous Latino
sister of the girl he came to help out. Long story short, the
Cosby Kids start expanding their horizons and become better more
respectable people until they are forced to return to their
animated reality to become lesser caricatures again. Then the
film ends with a visit to the real life Fat Albert’s gravesite
by Bill Cosby and the rest of the gang (now old, but still
sporting afros apparently).
Yikes. If you read all that and still want
to see this blemish on the ass of filmmaking, then you will get
what you deserve. As for the rest of you, avoid this film at
all costs. It might make for a good background movie while
you’re doing your taxes some rainy Sunday afternoon, but only
because it won’t pull your attention away. It was a bad concept
that was executed poorly and featured bad music and bad acting.
All in all, this film had no redeeming value at all. |
 |
